Oh well. sorry for opening the pandora box. But actually it was posted looong time ago but captured by aksimet. the tool, you can’t blog with it, can’t blog without it..

ok, case really really closed
peace to u all.

You’re welcome

I also did not say all Indonesian men suck! As a matter of fact far from it!

But such is life! And for me the case is closed until the next time someone opens this pandora’s box

Nice day to all!

@ Marisa and Ahmad Sudarsono;

Even though Indonesian woman chooses by her own free will to stay at home instead of working or to be beaten by her husband instead of divorce, there are underlying structures which enable/force her to choose in this particular way and which prevent males to choose in the same way. human behaviour study kinda want us to focus on these structures, when we attempt to disentangle the complicated relationship between the sexes.

These underlying structures reveal the true characteristics of gender inequalities. Gender inequalities are, first and foremost, about relations of dominance, about naturalised (and therefore unquestioned) norms, values and premises, which determine the paradigm of actions perceived as possible for individuals. Some have more or better options than others, but no one has none.

As an example lets take the case where most birth control used are female birth control (contradict the fact that women reproduction system is far more complicated than men), this means the woman made up her own mind and use birth control of her own free will.

However, the highly gendered structures of society predetermined her options. She is not free, her male partner are not free, even though they make up their own minds. They are all entangled in a particular dominant discursive structure. the naturalised and unquestioned norms, values, and premises of dominant masculinity – which victimise males and females alike.

@all:

I was working in a mixed culture office and i volunteered to be gender focal point once. and more than once, there were sexual harassments made by expats to the locals. As well as by the locals to expats. men to women, women to men and even men to men. All of the case went to higher level officers, (un)fortunately none of the case went to the police, (so we didn’t get harassed twice as Ahmad say :d ).

the Bules here are right, how do we think they feel when people (not necessarily indonesian men) mock the woman they date for the sake that she date them. i think such act should be included as social harassment.

but somehow i think, we addressed the problem wrongly. this isn’t about men and women, this is simply about individual morality. this show that-apparently, one (Oigal’s) or two (Rob’s) empirical experience is not enough premises to build hypothesis that Indonesian men are suck. Or else, you make some Indonesian (i wana say men, but interestingly Anita is a woman :d ) get mad.

Both Rob and Oigal has admitted their mistakes, so case closed (hopefully).

Not a matter of spin but rather one of usage that depends on context and intent…to each their own! It is not worth a long debate. I have rationalized my choice of word in my earlier post and if you still disagree or find that it is not the apt choice, then so be it!

We can start a different thread that explores the apt usage of particular words (or perhaps even a blog) in English, or not!

Later fellas…

Must say that I tend to think that Achmad has the stronger argument here. No matter how you spin it, mortgage is not as apt a word as monopoly in this context.