Tif the Fool and the Confederacy of Dunces

That Tif is a Fool is already a well known fact (if you don’t know, read this).

So it was hardly surprising when he embarrassed the country again by Twitting “eh kena deh” (the Indonesian equivalent to Yeech! in English) shortly after he shook the hand of US First Lady Michelle Obama.

Television footage showed him heartily and obsequiously shaking her hand.

Tiffie, however, was to protesteth too much on Twitter, his instrument of torture for the rest of us, saying (and quoted in the Washington Post): “I tried to prevent (being touched) with my hands but Mrs. Michelle held her hands too far toward me (so) we touched,” Information Minister Tifatul Sembiring told tens of thousands of followers on Twitter.

Well, what do you expect? As that sage of the human condition, Forrest Gump, would have put it: “Stupid is as stupid does.” When you put a Fool in the greeting lineup for a state guest the Fool will always act the Fool. The question that needs to be asked is what tomfoolery has prevented the President from firing Tif the Fool long ago, so that he would not grow up to be a national embarrassment as he has today.

In one fell stroke, he’s stolen the thunder from Obama and SBY, at least for the Twitterati of Indonesia.

Tif is not the only fool surrounding President SBY though. There are other fools about, namely the one who double-booked two heads of state, the Austrian and the American, for a visit on the same day. Haven’t these people ever heard of Outlook Calendars or even diaries?

There are also other fools lurking at the Istana, namely the ones that stuffed up with the translation headsets for the speech by the Austrian President and SBY. The result is that SBY looked foolish having to repeat hi speech several times because the headset for the Austrian president refused to work. The Austrian President looked hapless as he got no love and translation from his faulty headset.

All his leads one to ask the all important question: why is President SBY surrounded by so many fools and dunces? Is there a conspiracy against him? Is it a plot by jealous rival politicians? Is the CIA behind all this? Is SBY simply a magnet for this sort of people? Is he too nice to sack the fools surrounding him, assuming, of course, that he recognizes them as fools?

Unspun is full of fool questions tonight. Does anyone have an answer?

9 thoughts on “Tif the Fool and the Confederacy of Dunces

Add yours

  1. Saya tinggal di San Diego… This Tif news was all over the local & national news on any channel w/ standard script: Tif used both hands to shake & he was smiling.



  2. Mr. Unspuns,

    It is the Bule who ruin the headseat, because the two bule nations of Amrik and Austria cannot bear to see Indonesia rise to become a world power. I ever wrote about how CIA and FBI engineer the tsunamis and earthquakes in Indonesia to keep us down, but nothing can stop rise of Mojopahit. And you, a Malaysian, are just jealous of Batik and Tarian Pendet. What next ? Will you make Keong Racun your national anthem and say Shinta and Jojo are Malaysian ? Friend, better you cow tow to Indonesia now before the second rise of Mojopahit.


  3. Is good idea, Mr. Unspuns, good for Malaysia, who steals our talent. But we welcome to send your Mr. Najib to learn about what it means to be a true Melayu in Indonesia. I am thank.


  4. Achmad! Luama buanget gak ketemu! Mas, aku kangen…

    May I ask you if you think Michelle Obama is sexy in a jilbab? May I also ask if you happen to have entertained flickering visions of her subjecting Tifatul Sembiring to various practices involving a large bed, handcuffs and leather? Oh I’m sure you have, don’t try to tell me you haven’t…

    Will you also be seksi and talk to me about Ariel Peterporn and how the truth behind his case is that there is a big bad DALANG who also happens to be the cuckolded husband of one of his many conquests? Will you also explain to me why Indonesian peoples keep telling me this story, but when I repeat it to bules they don’t want to listen; they want to talk about the FPI? Please Achmad, I need you to explain these things to me (also, I wonder if you have ever cuckolded a wicked Dalang, and if so, how did you escape?). These are important questions; they must be answered, and if Mr Unspun won’t make a post about them, where else can I turn?


  5. The problem was he already announced his principle publicly. So every eyes focuses on his self. Something that can be said as a consequences, moreover as a public figure and state’s official.


  6. This is all very well but what I want to know is what on earth Tif thinks about the Blotch thing which you had me running around to set up and then it’s just sitting there for weeks; I think Tif would be disappointed because I’m sure he was very much looking forward to it.


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